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The evidence is conclusive.

Too much screen time in kids and teens correlates with an uptick in anxiety, depression, hyperactivity, and aggressive behaviors. Per one study, the more TV time kids got early in life, the more likely they were to struggle with class participation and math. Social media is so connected to mental health challenges that the U.S. Surgeon General has issued an advisory about it and Australia has outright banned it for teens under 16.

On top of all of the mental and emotional challenges that can come with it, screen time is hard on young bodies. Looking down at a screen can hurt their neck and strain their eyes. Teens who get a lot of screen time also tend to get insufficient physical activity and struggle with excess weight and sleep problems.

As a parent, you can take steps to protect your family from all of these risks. We have a few suggestions to help you establish healthier habits around screen time.

#1: Encourage their non-screen-based hobbies

If you’re worried your child or teen spends too much time looking at a screen, help them find healthy alternatives. The right place to start depends on your child/teen’s current interests.

If you already know about something they enjoy, lean into it. That might mean creating a space in your house where they can practice their instrument or do their art, or offering to drive them to pick-up league games.

If you’re not sure about anything existing that you can support, it’s time to help your teen or child explore areas with potential. The experts at the Johns Hopkins Center for Talented Youth have some tips your family can apply here.

#2: Find offline things to do together

Make non-screen time something you do as a family. Enjoying an activity together builds healthy family bonds. These can counterbalance a lot of the challenges that come with living in a digital age.

Here are a few ideas to get you started:

• Family walks (particularly if you have a dog)
• Cooking dinner together or baking
• Hiking
• Going thrift shopping
• Playing tabletop or card games
• Doing a puzzle
• Gardening
• Family book club

Try different things until you find something that all of you like doing together.

#3: Communicate about healthy screen use

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) used to recommend a certain ceiling on screen time (one hour a day for kids 2–12, two hours for teens). In 2016, though, they did away with those hard and fast rules. Instead, the AAP “recommend[s] considering the quality of interactions with digital media and not just the quantity, or amount of time.”

Talk with your kids and teens about how they use their screens — and how they want to use them.

It might be helpful to come alongside them to get a better idea of what they’re consuming from their screens. Co-viewing a show they like or watching them play a favorite video game should give you clarity. Then, you have an easy opening to talk about what’s healthy to be engaging with on a regular basis (e.g., avoiding excess violence).

As you’re talking about healthy screen use, you might also explore a digital detox together.

#4: Decide on rules together

Everyone chafes at rules that don’t make sense to them. Kids and teens are no exception. So work on setting rules together.

You might ask:

• How much screen time feels fair on weekends? What about school days?
• How do you want me to remind you that you’re out of screen time?
• What should the consequences of going over be?
• Do we want to establish any windows as tech-free times?
• Do you want to have any ways to earn screen time?
• Does using social media ever make you feel sad, anxious, or less than?
• Do you think I should let you watch/play things above your age limit (e.g., watching PG-13 movies for preteens)? If so, why?

Establish the rules together, and find a way to keep them visible for all of you.

#5: Model healthy habits

Your kids and teens are watching you. That gives you the opportunity to showcase healthy habits. When your child comes up to talk to you, put your phone away so you can engage with them. Be mindful of how much they see you sitting and scrolling. You might even say things like, “My eyes feel tired so I’m going to take a break.”

If you need some support to reduce your own phone time, we have a few suggestions teed up for you.

 

For most parents, managing screen time is an ongoing project. It changes as your child matures. It can get increasingly difficult as they get their own device and more autonomy.

Whatever phase your family is in, you don’t have to navigate this alone. For support in figuring out how to set healthy rules or communicate guidelines, you can see a therapist yourself. If this is a real sticking point in your household, doing some family sessions with your child or teen can help, too.

To explore using therapy to help your family establish healthier screen engagement, contact us.

In recent years, quite a bit of work has happened to help kids with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). A lot of young people have come up through school at a time when teachers and parents knew to watch for symptoms. The resulting support has been life-changing for many of them.

But what about those who missed the boat, so to speak? Maybe your symptoms didn’t get caught in childhood or you went through school before ADHD awareness spread. ADHD is a lifelong condition, which means it could be affecting your focus, emotional regulation, and other key parts of your life today.

The trick is that ADHD doesn’t always present the same way in adults. The signs might be more subtle. Still, if you’re living with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, getting diagnosed and starting treatment has the potential to transform your life. To help you decide if you should talk with a healthcare professional about this, let’s look at some of the common symptoms of ADHD in adulthood.

How ADHD looks different in adults

Hyperactivity is often the telltale symptom of ADHD in kids. In adults, though, that hyperactivity often doesn’t present overtly. Even if you never got treatment in childhood, you might have learned to manage or mask this symptom. With ADHD in adulthood, this often looks like a pervasive restlessness.

You might be physically fidgety, but you might also confine this restlessness to your inner world. Many adults with ADHD regularly deal with racing thoughts.

Adults also have more agency than kids, which can make their ADHD symptoms visible in their life choices. Partially due to the busy mind that often comes with this condition, you might make impulsive decisions — including risky ones.

Difficulty with time management also has a larger impact on adults with ADHD than on kids. This condition can cause something called time blindness, which makes it hard to manage everything from deadlines at work to commitments with friends and family.

You should also know that ADHD has different types. Some adults have hyperactive-impulsive presentation, which more closely mirrors what most people think of ADHD. But you can also have inattentive presentation. This affects your focus and attention. You might have trouble staying organized and on task, lose things often, and regularly forget things. In kids, this can be troublesome. As an adult, inattentive-type ADHD can take a serious toll on your ability to manage your career and daily life.

Getting treatment for ADHD in adulthood

If all of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) estimate that about 6% of adults in the US have ADHD.

You can self-screen to see if it’s worth seeking out care. Mental Health America has an online test for ADHD designed for adults to use themselves. You can also access the more technical Adult ADHD Self-Report Scale (ASRS-v1.1) that mental health pros use. You can self-score with this tool, but you’ll want to complete it again with a trained mental health professional to get a more accurate score.

If these tests indicate that you might have ADHD, seek out support. Getting diagnosed allows you to work with an expert to develop a personalized treatment plan. That usually means a combination of medication and therapy. Finding treatment that works for you can make your life notably easier.

We’re here to help. Our team can screen you for ADHD, then come alongside you to find the right treatment for you. Contact us to get started with a therapist with experience in ADHD today.

Here at the West Valley Counseling Center, we’re winding down our year. As we leave our offices and head out to enjoy the holiday season, we want to say thank you. Whether you’re a patient or someone who reads our blogs, your interest in mental health is moving the needle.

The stigma around mental health conditions has started to lift (see here and here for evidence). Because you care about this important part of overall wellness, you’re a part of that change. As we thought about what we were thankful for this Thanksgiving, the groundswell of support for increased mental health awareness and care ranked high on our list.

Thanksgiving might be over, but the holiday season is still in full swing. It can be a beautiful time of year, but it can also be a challenging one. We want to share a few tips to help you manage some common difficulties that crop up during this time of year.

Self-care suggestions for the holidays

Everything from your family dynamics to your budget can impact how you feel during this time of year. Still, some challenges seem to affect lots of us during this season. To help you manage them, we gathered up some tips:

• Monitor your stress level throughout December. If you’re feeling tense or anxious, take some proactive steps to protect yourself.
• Put some time on your calendar that you use to do what you enjoy about the holiday season (e.g., walking around and looking at lights, seeing The Nutcracker). Before you make other plans this December, always check your calendar and protect that time for yourself.
• Stick with the parts of your routine that feel healthy. Make it a priority to get enough sleep, exercise regularly, and eat nutritious foods — even if that means saying no to some things.
• If you have difficult family dynamics, make a plan for yourself before you go to any holiday events. You might work on internal boundary setting, or you might script responses to difficult questions you routinely get asked (like when you’re going to start dating or having kids).
• Mind your budget. Overspending during this holiday season means heading into the new year stretched thin. Handmade gifts can mean a lot and help you save money.

We have a guide from a few years back that offers some additional guidance to help you protect yourself and the people you love this holiday season.

We wish you the best during this time of year

This time of year comes with its fair share of difficulties. It also invites us to slow down and drop into the moment with the people who matter most to us (including ourselves!).

To take advantage of that, we’re going to take a little break from blogging. We’ll be back in mid-January.

We hope you find similar ways to lean into the good parts of the holiday season. Take care of yourself. You deserve the gift of doing what you enjoy and protecting yourself from excess stress.

If you want help navigating the difficulties that come with this time of year or you want to get set up to start 2026 with support, we’re here. Contact our team to explore starting therapy.

Life can be more difficult for people living on the autism spectrum. Understanding social cues can be challenging, and communication might feel extra burdensome. Hypersensitivity can make situations overwhelming. And layered on top of all of this, people with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) often face mental health conditions.

That’s not great news on the surface. But as with many areas of ASD, awareness is a key first step.

Connecting ASD and mental health conditions

While estimates vary, experts across the board agree that people living on the spectrum have a higher likelihood of another diagnosis: a mental health condition.

By one estimate, as many as 70% of autistic people have a mental health condition. 40% of those folks have more than one mental health challenge at play.

By another, the estimate ranges all the way up to 94%.

(For reference, only about 20% of the general population lives with a mental health condition.)

The data also says that a range of mental health challenges can affect kids and teens with ASD. Those include:

• Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) (35.3%)
• Anxiety (17.1%)
• Depression (7.5%)
• Bipolar disorder (7.8%)

In short, if you’re on the spectrum and you’re dealing with mental health challenges, you’re certainly not alone.

If someone you love has ASD and you’ve noticed the signs of mental health difficulties, don’t dismiss them. The high likelihood that they’re living with a mental health condition means you should get involved to get them the care they need.

It’s serious: Suicidal ideation for kids and teens on the spectrum

Last month, The LA Times published an article underscoring the importance of paying attention here. Some key takeaways include:

• Autistic people are more likely to die from suicide, per one study, and 20% of kids and teens with ASD had ideated suicide.
• Another study reported that kids with ASD ideate suicide younger, starting before eight years old in about a third of kids.
• Data from a 2023 meta-analysis showed that 10% of kids and teens with ASD had attempted suicide, double that of their non-ASD peers.
• A higher cognitive ability connects to a higher likelihood of suicidal ideation in youth on the spectrum, per another study.

Then, the article pivots to helping families and caregivers protect autistic kids and teens.

For starters, it encourages you to ask directly about suicide if you’re concerned. Choose your child or teen’s preferred communication method (a letter might be better, for example). But don’t worry that asking will “plant” the idea in their head. Directly asking provides a core measure of protection, researchers say.

Additionally, you should watch for different warning signs than in neurotypical kids and teens. Those include:

• Sudden or increased withdrawal
• No words to communicate acute distress
• A current traumatic event, reported by self or others
• Marked increase in rate and/or severity of self-harm
• Worsening in levels of symptoms of anxiety and/or depression
• A new focus on suicidal talk, ideation, or death-related topics that are not a special interest
• Perseverative suicidal thoughts and ruminations
• Seeking means or making plans for suicide or suicide rehearsal
• Statements about no reason for living or no sense of purpose in life
• Hopelessness

Experts are working on better ways to screen for mental health challenges in neurodivergent youth. In the meantime, though, watching your child and teen and communicating in their preferred methods goes a long way.

You also don’t need to navigate this alone. Our team offers care for neurodivergent people and their family members. Therapy can help your autistic child or teen manage their mental health challenges, lowering their risk of suicidal ideation. For support, contact us today.

By Rachel Lee, Pre-Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

Most of us have to work. Unfortunately, this necessity of life can introduce a range of stressors. To help you manage them, we tapped Rachel Lee, one of our team members with experience in this area.

Here are Rachel’s seven takeaways about work. If you’re feeling burdened by tension around your job, #7 holds particular power for you.

1. Work is one of the top sources of stress for adults

According to the American Psychological Association, work consistently ranks as a leading stressor for U.S. adults. Many people report significant stress related to workload, unclear expectations, or lack of support. This often shows up in therapy as anxiety, irritability, trouble sleeping, or emotional exhaustion.

2. Burnout is a systemic issue, not a personal weakness

The World Health Organization defines burnout as a workplace phenomenon tied to chronic stress, not an individual flaw. People often internalize blame when the real issue is unrealistic expectations, unclear roles, or workplace cultures that make recovery nearly impossible.

3. Certain groups face heightened pressure

Women, working parents, and first-generation professionals frequently describe unique stressors:

• Women often carry emotional labor at work.
• Parents (especially mothers) feel pressure during return-to-work transitions.
• First-gen professionals often feel heightened pressure to prove themselves, which can intensify anxiety or self-doubt.

4. Imposter feelings are extremely common, especially during transitions

Up to 70% of people experience imposter feelings at some point. These feelings often surface during job changes, promotions, layoffs, or other major transitions.

Imposter feelings aren’t a diagnosis. They’re a normal reaction to new expectations, ambiguity, and lack of supportive mentorship.

5. Stress often shows up physically before people identify it emotionally

Clients commonly report early signs like:

• Sleep issues
• Headaches
• Difficulty focusing
• Irritability
• A sense of “not feeling like myself”

These symptoms often appear before someone recognizes the emotional or workplace component.

6. Today’s job market is amplifying anxiety for many people

The current job market is unpredictable across industries, and many people are navigating layoffs, hiring freezes, or long job searches. To compound the issue, being let go can trigger shame, fear, or identity loss. Then, struggling to land a new role can lead to prolonged anxiety and exhaustion, even for highly skilled professionals.

7. Therapy can help even when there’s no crisis.

Many people come to therapy because they want more balance, clearer boundaries, support navigating office dynamics, or help managing stress before it escalates. Therapy provides a space to understand patterns and build practical tools that support long-term well-being.

If any of these insights about work-related stress resonated with you, you could probably benefit from talking with our team. We offer career counseling if you’re trying to find your path, tools for boundary-setting, and any other support you need to manage your job, joblessness, or anything else related to work. Contact us and our intake coordinator can help you connect to one of our therapists.

Fatherhood can be one of the most rewarding, joyful experiences of your life. It can also be one of the most challenging. At our upcoming program, Dad Strength, we want to hold space for men to explore all of the beauties and complexities that come with having a child.

Whether you’re out on paternal leave with an infant at home, navigating through a teenager who’s bringing new challenges in your household, or trying to understand our roles as parents, we invite you to join us. At three sessions in December, we’ll be getting together to talk, process, and build connections with other fathers. If you’re looking for some support as you navigate parenthood, stress, identity, and relationships, you’re in the right place.

The goals of Dad Strength

We created Dad Strength with the goal of helping fathers clarify who they want to be in their roles as caregivers, partners, and men. We want to make space to explore the strengths you already have, along with the stories you’ve inherited about fatherhood.

We know that fathers face plenty of challenges. There’s the burden to provide for your family and the expectation to be a pillar of strength even in the midst of the messiness of family life. Layer on the little-known conditions of paternal postpartum depression and anxiety, which affect one in 10 men.

Plus, if you’re still in partnership with the mother, you have to contend with all of the ways parenting changes your relationship. Dads are more likely to feel judged by their partner for how they parent than moms, for example.

And if you’re a single dad, that comes with a wealth of its own challenges, too.

Fortunately, you don’t have to figure any of this out alone. By getting together with other men, you can first learn that you’re not alone in your experience of fatherhood. While your family dynamics are undoubtedly unique, you probably have many of the same concerns, celebrations, and challenges as other dads.

In fostering the connection between fathers, we make it easier to explore support mechanisms for you and your family. You might go home and try something another dad said worked for him.

Ultimately, we want to help each man move toward a more grounded, intentional connection with the people they care about.

Join Dad Strength

We’re holding three hour-long sessions throughout December as part of a singular program. On Mondays from 5 to 6 p.m., we’ll be at our sister campus, the Ventura Counseling and Wellness Center (950 County Square Drive, Unit 111 in Ventura).

Dad Strength falls on:

• December 1
• December 8
• December 15

Each session costs $25.

For more information or to sign up, contact Eric at (805) 620-8046 or eric.vcwc@gmail.com.

This is just one way our team wants to support fathers. If you think you’d benefit from one-on-one support, we can connect you to a therapist who fits your needs. We also offer family counseling if you want to come in with your partner, child, or as a family unit. Don’t hesitate to contact us.

By Em McElroy, Marriage and Family Therapist Trainee

Music has always been a constant in my life — a fellow companion during moments of anger, grief, heartache, joy, and everything in between. I’ve turned to music to make sense of feelings I couldn’t quite name and to find comfort when words felt too small.

Over time, I came to understand that music doesn’t just accompany our emotions. It helps us feel them more deeply, process and move through them, and sometimes transform them.

As a therapist, my lifelong connection to music naturally became part of how I understand the world, and how I strive to support others. The same qualities that make music so moving make it a powerful tool for healing: the rhythm, bass vibration, melodies, lyrics, and ability to bypass the analytical mind and tap into emotions.

The therapeutic benefits of music

Music has a profound effect on the brain and body. Research shows that it can lower stress hormones, reduce anxiety, and improve overall mood. But beyond science, many people intuitively feel music’s ability to shift emotional states. It can do everything from mobilizing us when we have low energy to soothing us when we’re overwhelmed.

Listening to or creating music engages the nervous system in a regulating way. The rhythm of a song can slow a racing heart, while melody and harmony can evoke feelings of safety and connection. For those who find it difficult to express emotions through words, music offers another language — one that speaks directly to the body and heart.

Shared musical experiences, whether listening together or creating sound as a group, can also build a sense of belonging and community. There’s something profoundly healing about feeling “in sync” with others.

How I use music therapy

In therapy, music can take many forms.

It might be as simple as bringing in and exploring a song that resonates with a client’s story, or using music to help regulate the nervous system. We might build personalized playlists to support emotional regulation or grounding between sessions, or listen to songs together in-session and discuss, if it feels right.

Sometimes, music can express what’s difficult to say aloud. You don’t need to be a musician for music to be therapeutic. You only need curiosity and willingness to listen, both inwardly and outwardly.

For many clients, these musical explorations can open access to deeper emotional layers, bringing forward memories, insights, and sensations that can be processed with direct support.

Looking ahead: Music therapy groups

In the near future, we’ll be offering expressive arts and music-focused therapy groups designed to bring people together in creative, mindful, and embodied ways. These groups will blend somatic awareness, mindfulness, and expressiveness. Our goal is to offer a safe space for connection, release, and play.

Some offerings in development include:

• Therapeutic Music Listening Circles, exploring emotion, connection, stories, and histories through music and sound.
• Vocal Expression, Mindful Movement, & Nervous System Regulation Workshops, reconnecting with the voice and body through music, as a grounding, liberating tool.

To learn more or to get started with music therapy for yourself, contact our team.

Maybe you’ve been thinking about getting some mental health support. It can be a bit of a tricky situation, though. The reason you’re seeking help might be an obstacle to getting it. You might feel anxious about your first appointment, even if you’re seeking guidance on managing anxiety. Or depression can make it hard to muster up the motivation to take the first step to find a therapist.

A lot of people benefit from a little nudge to get started with therapy. Just telling someone to search “therapy near me” online isn’t very helpful. If you’ve felt overwhelmed with the early steps required to get mental health support, you’re in the right place. Our team developed a few actionable tips that can help you get over that hurdle.

#1: Explore your options

Like most kinds of medical care, therapy comes in a lot of different forms. You can get cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which focuses on helping you unlearn negative thought patterns. A lot of talk therapy (what you probably picture when you think of going to therapy) uses CBT.

But that’s not your only option. You can also explore alternative mental health support like art therapy or group sessions. If you’re looking for support with a specific relationship, you might benefit from couples counseling or interpersonal therapy. If you’re struggling at work or with finding work, career counseling is probably a really good fit.

If you want to do a deeper dive into any of the types of therapy available to you, Psychology Today has thorough starter guides you can use.

Here, it helps to think about the kind of help you want. Do you want to break a pattern that’s hurting you, or get help navigating your relationship with a particular person or group of people? What’s your goal for therapy?

Once you know that, talk to a mental health pro. They can help match you with the right kind of care. Our intake coordinator, for example, is available to offer this kind of guidance. You can reach us at (818) 758-9450 or info@westvalleycounseling.org to get started.

#2: Learn what to expect

Fear of the unknown is a big and common obstacle to starting therapy. To help alleviate that, we have a guide that covers what to expect at your first appointment.

From there, your therapist will tailor a treatment plan to you. They’ll recommend a specific cadence for your appointments (e.g., weekly, bi-weekly). They might suggest additional tools you can do during sessions or on your own, like art therapy or body work (i.e., somatic therapy). You’ll get a much clearer idea of what therapy will look like for you after you meet with your therapist a few times.

It can also be helpful to know that you won’t necessarily be in therapy forever. The American Psychological Association says that about half of people get the relief they’re seeking with about 15–20 sessions.

#3: If at first you don’t succeed…

Finding a therapist is a little like dating. You might not click with the first person you meet. It takes work to find the right connection, but most people report it’s definitely worth it.

If you have a few sessions with your therapist and it’s not working for you, don’t be afraid to part ways and try someone else.

That doesn’t mean you need to go back to the drawing board of googling “therapy near me.” At the West Valley Counseling Center, we have multiple therapists on staff so we can rematch you with someone else who might be a better fit.

We’re here to help you navigate all of this. For support in getting started with therapy, call us, email us, or use our online form to request a call back whenever you’re ready.