Breaking the Silence: Destigmatizing Mental Health in the Military

In the high-stakes, high-performance world of military service, strength and resilience are virtues. But what happens when those expectations leave little room for vulnerability — especially when it comes to mental health?

For many servicemembers, the pressure to appear invincible can lead to a culture of silence. Emotional struggles are often hidden behind tight-lipped professionalism, and seeking help may feel like admitting defeat. But the truth is, mental health care is not a sign of weakness. It’s a strategy for long-term strength.

The reality of mental health challenges in the military

Dealing with a mental health challenge like depression, anxiety, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD often makes people feel alone. But the reality is: you’re not. More than a half-million active service members of the U.S. Armed Forces have a diagnosed mental health disorder.

The actual number of affected people is probably higher, too. One study found that 60% of military personnel dealing with a mental health difficulty don’t seek help. Why not? Leading reasons were “My unit leadership might treat me differently” and “I would be seen as weak.”

If that sounds familiar, let that be even more validation that you’re not alone in this. And taking care of your mental health doesn’t just benefit you. It positively impacts your family and friends.

If you’re still serving, it also matters for your unit. When mental health is neglected, it can impair judgment, performance, and cohesion. Supporting psychological wellbeing isn’t just compassionate. It’s critical to operational effectiveness.

Breaking the stigma: The first step

As with any destigmatization, the first step in breaking the stigma around mental health in the military is simply talking about it.

If you’ve been dealing with a mental health challenge yourself, consider finding someone close to you that you can talk to. If you don’t feel safe with anyone you currently know, that’s an excellent indicator you’d benefit from finding a therapist.

If you’re not living with a mental health condition, your role is just as important here. Be open. Listen. Ask questions to your friends who serve(d) with you, checking in on their mental wellness.

The more you talk about mental health, the more people will feel like they can share their own experience with it.

Finding military-backed and outside mental health support

Leaders within the Armed Forces are well aware that mental health challenges are prevalent among their organizations. That’s why they offer resources to help.

Within Military OneSource, you can request confidential counseling. You can also tap into the Military Family Life Counseling (MFLC) program to find options near you. There are more than 300 available counselors across California.

Alternatively, you might prefer to see a mental health pro outside of the military umbrella. If you’d rather keep your service and your mental healthcare separate, we have some tips to help you find a therapist.

By opening up dialogue, we can reshape how mental health is viewed in the military community. It starts with listening, sharing, and supporting each other so no one feels like they’re carrying the weight alone. And we’re here to help. If you want to find a therapist to come alongside you and help you care for your mental wellness, contact us.

Building Emotional Agility in Kids: Tips From a Child Therapist in Woodland Hills

Life can be overwhelming for kids and teens as LAUSD and other schools in the San Fernando Valley schools start back up in the fall. Between stress about school, sports, and extracurriculars and pressure from their peers, there’s usually a lot on their mind. Layer in growing bodies and changing hormone levels and it’s no surprise a lot of teens and kids are going through it.

If you’re a parent, teacher, or other key figure in a child’s life, you probably want to help. Teaching them about emotional agility gives you a way to do exactly that. Our team of child therapists serve Woodland Hills and the surrounding area. We’ve seen a lot of local parents, teachers, and other adults benefit from helping kids explore emotional agility.

Understanding emotional agility

Kids and teens often feel pressure to behave or perform in a certain way. That might lead them to ignore or push aside their emotions, particularly ones that are typically labeled “bad” like anger or jealousy.

Our child therapists often teach about emotional agility because it offers a different framework. With this mentality, we don’t label emotions as good or bad. Instead, we see them as information. When a teen or kid is experiencing an emotion, it’s their body and mind trying to tell them something.

Developed by psychologist Dr. Susan David, this approach invites kids and teens to look more closely at what they’re feeling — and learn from it. This often helps them better manage their feelings.

Four steps to help kids and teens practice emotional agility

Our team of child therapists in Woodland Hills often lays out the following four steps to help teens and kids explore emotional agility.

 

#1: Start by naming the emotion
Here, it might be helpful to teach kids the rhyme, “Name it to tame it.” Using an emotion chart or wheel can help them pinpoint what they’re feeling.

The key in this first step is to help the teen or child identify the emotion without attaching any judgment to it. Encourage them to be curious about what they’re feeling.

 

#2: Normalize the feeling
Remind the teen or child that all feelings are okay. The emotion is information, not an indicator of how they are as a person. Be with them to hold space for that emotion, no matter what it is.

 

#3: Pause
The emotion becomes information the teen or child can use when they learn to put space between feeling and reacting. They can take a breath or count to five, for example. This pause allows them to listen to what their body’s telling them as they experience the emotion.

 

#4: Align with their values
Don’t tell the child or teen how to react or respond. Instead, help them explore how they can make choices that align with their values even while they’re experiencing that emotion. If they want to be a good friend, that might mean deciding not to act on their anger.

It can be helpful to ask, “What kind of person do you want to be in this situation?”

Resources recommended our team of child therapists in Woodland Hills

The biggest tip we can give adults here is: model the emotional agility yourself. Talk with kids and teens about what you’re feeling and how you’re deciding to engage with that emotion based on your values.

Our child therapists in Woodland Hills also developed a list of resources that might be helpful:

Emotional agility doesn’t help kids stay happy all the time. Instead, it gives them a way to feel all of their feelings without labeling them as good or bad. By holding that space with a pause before they decide to act, this practice helps kids live freely and gives them a way to move forward based on their values.

This is only a brief overview, though. If you want to talk more about emotional agility and other tools to help the child or teen in your life, schedule some time with a child therapist in Woodland Hills. Our experienced, compassionate team is ready to come alongside you. Send us a message online or call us to get something scheduled.

Self-Care: What you need to know

Self-care is trending. But before you dismiss it with the heap of other pointless social media trends, consider what you need. Would your mind or body benefit from you putting time and energy into caring for yourself? If you often feel tired, anxious, stressed, or depressed, the answer is probably yes. So let’s take a closer look at self-care.

What is self-care?

Think of someone you love in your life. Now think about the ways you care for them. That could be making time for them, giving them words of encouragement, or getting them gifts. You probably actively care for all of the people in your life on a regular basis. But many of us don’t do the same for ourselves.

Self-care is the active investment of time and energy in (you guessed it!) caring for ourselves. It’s an act of acknowledging that our minds and bodies work hard and need some attention. This isn’t self-obsession or narcissism. It’s the recognition that rest and restoration are key, that having compassion for ourselves is important, and that we should show ourselves the same kindness we show others.

Why self-care is important.

But is self-care really necessary? Older generations never talked about self-care and they all turned out fine. But you could also argue that self-care was better built into daily life in a pre-digital age. Now, disconnecting is impossible unless you make a concerted effort. To combat the stressors of living the average American life in 2018, self-care matters. Here are a few reasons why.

It mitigates stress.

Mental health is in a critical state in our country. More Americans than ever report suffering from anxiety and depression. And a portion of that can be attributed to the fact that most of us feel stressed most of the time. Dedicating time to self-care – whether that means getting enough sleep, carving out time for an activity you enjoy, or meditating– helps you manage stressors and protect your mental wellbeing.

It supports mindfulness.

We live in a fast-moving, highly-connected world. It’s not uncommon to go through an entire day simply responding to the inputs in front of us. But when we climb into a bed after a day of simply trying to keep our heads above water, we often feel exhausted and unfulfilled. Taking time to slow down and practice self-care disconnects us from this go-go-go mentality so we can pause and mindfully enjoy the best moments in our lives.

You can’t pour from an empty cup.

When you’re burnt out, you don’t feel up to much. That includes being there for the people in your life and investing in your community. Think of it this way. If your energy levels are a cup, self-care is a way to refill it. And you’re only able to pour yourself into the people around you when your cup isn’t already drained.

Quick and easy ways to practice self-care.

Fortunately, there are some really easy ways to jump in with self-care today! Remember, this is just an act of taking care of yourself. So it’s really as simple as dedicating some time to doing what you feel like your body and mind need. Here are a few suggestions to get you started.

Get outside.

When was the last time you spent an hour in nature with no agenda? Head to the beach or your favorite hiking trail and enjoy. Spending time in the fresh air is good for you.

Drink a beverage.

Slowing down in our busy world is hard. Sure, all of us could probably benefit from an hour of meditation – but getting our minds corraled for that long feels very challenging. Instead, brew a cup of your favorite warm beverage. Find a comfy place to sit and enjoy your coffee or tea. Taking that time – even if it’s just ten minutes – to rest with your thoughts and find contentment could transform your whole day.

Sleep.

No, really. Practicing self-care can be as simple as getting some shut-eye. This is all about giving ourselves what we need. And if your body is telling you it needs rest, listen to it!

Journal.

There is power in learning to observe our thoughts and listen to our internal dialogue. Journaling can make that easier. If your brain has been feeling muddled, try pulling out pen and paper. The act of capturing your thoughts can help you unlock new potential and unload burdens.

Say no.

A big part of the reason all of us feel so stressed and tired is that we stretch ourselves to our full capacity. And, sure, it’s exciting to see what we can accomplish when we strive, but striving all day, every day isn’t healthy. One of the most powerful acts of self-care is saying no to things that would overextend you.

Talk to us.

Another great way to care for yourself is to make sure that you have the support you need. Our team at the Ventura Counseling & Wellness Center is here if you want to talk. To learn more about wellness and counseling services, get in touch.

Is Winter Wearing You Down?

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a depression that occurs in fall or winter and does not end until spring or summer. There are many theories of what causes SAD, the largest being a Vitamin D deficiency. Vitamin D deficiency can stem from a lack of sun exposure, as well as disruptions in sleeping and waking cycles. An important neurotransmitter or brain chemical, known as serotonin, is sensitive to light, and the absence of light can affect its potency and release, which may lead to depression. SAD is a form of clinical depression and can interfere with school, work, relationships, health, and more. The physical, emotional, and cognitive issues that accompany SAD can have long-term, negative effects when experienced without treatment. Simple chores and work tasks can seem insurmountable for those suffering with SAD, but luckily there are many options that can help alleviate this type of depression.
Here are some things you can do (please consult a licensed physician beforehand):

– Light-Therapy: shown to have very beneficial effects for patients with SAD. This therapy utilizes a light box that mimics the sun’s natural rays, typically around 2,500-10,000 Lux (amount of light intensity). Patients who sit in front of this box for at least half an hour a day can talk on the phone, read, or do anything while awake to achieve the optimum benefits

– Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: This has been shown to have the best long-term outcomes, and can also improve quality of life year round

– Antidepressants: please consult a licensed MD before taking antidepressants. A prescription medicine may help alleviate SAD but is recommended to be taken in conjunction with cognitive-behavioral therapy

– Exercise: Can seem incredibly daunting, but even a short walk around the neighborhood every day has been shown to have positive effects on mood and health. To stay accountable, try inviting a family member, friend, or neighbor to exercise with you. They will reap the benefits, too!

– Go outside every day: Try to get out as much as possible, and take advantage of sunny days by eating lunch outside, going on a hike, or doing something artistic, like painting or writing

– Create a healthy sleep routine: This is crucial. Set a consistent time to go to sleep at night and wake up each morning. Avoid television, computers, and carbohydrates before bed for best results

– Take up new hobbies: This is a great way to meet new people and break up the monotony of the winter months. Hobbies that include an aspect of social interaction, such as Book Clubs, Sports, or cooking classes, can also improve mood and increase happiness. For book clubs in your area, please refer to: http://www.readerscircle.org/

Above all, patients must be willing to work towards dealing with Seasonal Affective Disorder in a productive and meaningful way.
For more information about Therapy or Counseling in the San Fernando Valley or to speak to one of our staff, please contact us (818) 758-9450 or email us info at info@westvalleycounseling.org
West Valley Counseling Center is located at 19634 Ventura Blvd. Suite 212 Tarzana, CA 91356

Disaster Mental Health

Recently, I had some experience with the effects of disaster during the Sonoma and Napa wildfires.  I wasn’t in Northern California at the time but family members, including my husband, were. Not only did I witness their reactions to the events, but I felt secondary distress before and after.

This is what I know:

 

When we are stressed our bodies react by releasing hormones and other chemicals that push us into fight or flight so that we have the energy to get away, or stand and fight the danger. Some people react differently; they might freeze, literally unable to move, or they might feel absolute calm during disaster – which doesn’t mean they won’t later feel the effects.

When the danger passed, people complained of feeling weak, sore or “beat up”, exhausted by the experience. They said they felt tired, needing more sleep than usual; others said they were  waking up hour after hour, tormented by anxiety or by flashbacks. Most of the people I know said they were “scattered” or unable to think straight. Many people shifted into high gear after the fires, remaining in a state of fight or flight for days. One relative who has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder noticed that her symptoms were more and more bothersome daily. Another friend who suffers from anxiety only got worse during and after the disaster, others with chronic illness such as depression found that their warning signs were much worse. The one who was completely calm began to have difficulty sleeping about ten days after the fires started. The experience intensified everything for everyone.

Meanwhile, at home in Los Angeles, I started losing things like keys, phone, appointment book, things I found after a frantic search, right where I had left them. I started over-worrying at the thought that I might be late, and couldn’t sleep more than four hours a night. And I wasn’t even there during the disaster.

Each of us react to disaster in different ways, and each of us recover from disaster in different ways. Recovering from disaster (or any other major stressor) does not happen overnight. People need caring and support, time, and encouragement to find their way but in most cases the body and brain need to be reminded to relax and heal. Deep breathing, picturing a calming place, playing with a pet may, listening to favorite music or guided relaxation meditation may help;  for some people prayer is calming, for others specific relaxation exercises may help (there are apps and information available online). Pick what works for you! Take good care of yourself!

Physical activity such as a brisk walk or other exercise activates deeper breathing and relieves muscle tension. Exercise helps the brain to move forward, no matter how you choose to do it. Activities such as coloring or other art projects, keep the mind moving forward, and support calm.  These types of activities can also provide distraction; a needed break from stress. Eat good, nutritious food, drink plenty of water, and try to spend time every day relaxing.

Finally, support from others can be a big part of recovering from disaster. Sometimes it helps to tell the story of what happened, sometimes it is too soon or too painful. Everyone is different!  Sometimes family and friends help the healing, and other times it may be important to find a mental health professional to support friends, family or yourself move through the process of recovery. Accept the help that is offered, it is meant with love and kindness!

If you’d like to make a tax-deductible donation of any amount to support WVCC, please go to our website at westvalleycounseling.org, or you can mail a check directly to West Valley Counseling Center at 19634 Ventura Blvd Suite 212, Tarzana, CA 91356. The tax ID number is 27-2188918.

WVCC to open a new location in Ventura County

West Valley Counseling Center is excited to share with you our plans to open an additional office in Ventura County

In keeping with our mission of providing affordable, community-based therapeutic services at our new location in Ventura, CA., WVCC will model the same strong foundation that has allowed West Valley Counseling Center to make meaningful contributions to the community Our highly trained therapists at the Ventura location will provide compassionate mental health care in a private practice setting, all at a reasonable cost.
The Ventura office, scheduled to open September 1st is located at 5450 Ralston St, Ventura.Ca. Our grand opening is scheduled for Sunday, September 17. Check our website
(westvalleycounseling.org) for more details and updates.

On behalf of the staff at West Valley Counseling Centers, we thank you for the opportunity to serve you. Our goal is to help children, families, and adults receive the services they need to thrive. We look forward to walking side by side with you in that journey.

Art Therapy With Children and Teens

Art Therapy With Children and Teens:
Where Youth make social, emotional, and behavioral changes while having fun in the process.

Children love to make art; they are naturally creative and imaginative. As such, art therapy can be a more enjoyable and less threatening approach to treatment than traditional talk therapy. The art therapist will tailor art interventions, projects, and material choice to match the individual child’s unique preferences, needs, and goals. This means that art therapy will work differently for everyone. That being said, there are some overall concepts that can explain how art therapy works.

Art Therapy, Emotion Management, and Behavior Change
Sometimes it is difficult for children to find the words to accurately articulate what they are feeling. Without a way to express emotion, children might release painful or otherwise overwhelming feelings in inappropriate or unsafe ways. For example, anger might lead to aggression, sadness might lead to inattention at school, fear might lead to running away, etc. Expressing emotions in art allows children a cathartic release after which they feel a sense of ease. In this way children learn to use art as a coping skill to process emotions, so that they can feel empowered to show up in the world at their best.

Art Therapy, Stressful Life Events, and Trauma
Challenging life events such as divorce, death of a loved one, bullying, or trauma can impede a child’s capacity to function at their maximum potential. Some youth might feel intimidated or overwhelmed if asked to discuss these events directly. Addressing life challenges creatively and speaking through metaphor offers a level of distance from what might otherwise be overwhelming to address. Art making eases children into facing their challenges, beginning the process of acceptance and healing.

Art Therapy and Social Skills
Children and adolescents with poor social skills might be intimidated by verbal interaction, or else tend to play out socially inappropriate patterns when engaging verbally. To introduce artistic collaboration and creative team building exercises in an art therapy group is to utilize a language that all children enjoy and respond to. Since art is a fun language, one children haven’t developed inappropriate behavior patterns through, children can more effectively communicate and bond with their peers. Social skills concepts such as teamwork, reading social/emotional cues, listening, etc. are addressed as they arise in the group process to achieve learning through experience.

Art Therapy and Self Esteem
In art therapy youth are non-judgmentally heard and praised for any form of creation they make. The concept of “good” art does not exist, instead children are empowered to appreciate the uniqueness of their artistic voices. All children, regardless of artistic ability, learn to think of themselves as competent artists with something to say, which builds self-esteem and motivation.

For more information on how art therapy works feel free to contact Liat Alon, registered and board certified art therapist, at Liat@westvalleycounseling.org.

Announcement of April Fundraising Event at WVCC

Join us! Community Get-Together on Friday, April 7, 2017

It’s almost spring, and self-care is in the air! West Valley Counseling Center is hosting a community get-together on Friday, April 7, 2017, from 4:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. Stop in for a good time and a great cause! Your donations will enter you to win “relaxing” prizes from local businesses.

We are excited to share our passion for the work we have been doing in the community. Enjoy wine, cheese, and sweets, and chat with the center staff. Learn more about what we do, and about our work in the local community. It’ll be an evening of great conversation and tips on small actions that can make a big difference.

Our event will be at West Valley Counseling Center, 19634 Ventura Blvd, Suite 212, Tarzana, CA 91356. Free parking is available behind the building, and our get-together will be on the second floor.

To make sure we have enough refreshments for everyone, please RSVP to Lacey (lacey@westvalleycounseling.org) or Karyn (karyn@westvalleycounseling.org) by April 1. We’d love to see you there.

Be sure to ask us about our community programs, including:
•    Helping Families Thrive: Domestic violence prevention and counseling
•    Mental Health Reentry Program: Mental health and supportive services for young adults reentering society from the criminal justice system
•    Life In Transition Workshop: scholarship program providing intensive 3-day workshops for trauma survivors

If you’d like to make a tax-deductible donation of any amount to support WVCC, please go to our website at westvalleycounseling.org, or you can mail a check directly to West Valley Counseling Center at 19634 Ventura Blvd Suite 212, Tarzana, CA 91356. The tax ID number is 27-2188918.

Together We Make a Community. Together We Heal. Together We Can Ensure a Better Future for All.

Together We Make a Community. Together We Heal. Together We Can Ensure a Better Future for All.

That was the theme for WVCC’s April 7 Spring Benefit Event, celebrating our 6th year serving the community.
And what an awesome success it was thanks to all of you!

My thanks to my wonderful staff who showed up by getting the word out to the community, bringing in friends and family, selling raffle tickets, and all the “backstage work” cleaning the offices, baking treats for the event and all the clean-up at the end of the evening.

And a special thank you to Lacey Jimenez & Karyn Adelstein for all their hard work in putting this all together. It is an honor to work with such a great team.

I also want to thank the many local business owners who donated raffle prizes: Loews Santa Monica Beach Hotel, Ancora Cucina Italiana Restaurant, Outlaw Barbershop & Salon, Nova Center, Skagen, Museum of Latin American Art, YogaWorks, The Massage Place, SoulCycle, and many others.

And most important, all the community members who attended this event and honored us with your presence and support. It was great to see old friends and meet new ones. I personally had a great time! Hope you did, too!

With love & gratitude,
Sharon Sharon Burnett
Founder & Director
West Valley Counseling Center

Your continued donations will help support our mission of providing the dignity of quality mental health and social services programs to all regardless of socio-economic circumstances or limitations.

Programs in Need of Funding
• Helping Families Thrive Program provides psychosocial and mental health services for immigrant families
• Domestic Violence Prevention Program provides education, prevention and counseling for domestic abuse survivors
• Mental Health Reentry Program provides mental health services for adults and their families reentering society from the criminal justice system.
• Life In Transition Workshop Scholarship Program offers full or partial scholarships for trauma survivors and those experiencing current or past losses, to attend a 3-day intensive workshop

Three Ways to Donate
• One time donation (cash, credit card or check made payable to WVCC)
• Monthly contribution (sign up on our PayPal account at westvalleycounseling.org)
• Designate West Valley Counseling Center as your charitable organization if you are a Ralphs card member or shop at Amazon.com

Breathe: Staying Present When Holiday Fun Becomes Holiday Frustration

While the holidays are a special time of year for us, our families, and friends, our schedules can become so packed with activities that we experience mental traffic jams from time to time. It can be difficult to stay in choice, to maintain a balance in our daily lives, because we feel obligated to participate in as many events as we can.

In a previous blog entry, we talked about dealing with typical holiday stresses. From family get-togethers to office and neighborhood parties, this time of year can easily become the “hectic holidays.” Are you dealing with some or all of the following?

–    Family visits
–    Attending parties and get-togethers
–    Cooking holiday meals
–    Hanging decorations and lights
–    Shopping for gifts
–    Inclement weather
–    Traveling

During the holiday season, there’s always something to be done, and there’s always someone to visit (or someone who is visiting you). You may feel that you’re always running from one thing to the next, and are unable to save some time for yourself.

One thing that may help? Slow down, stop if you need to, and breathe. A few minutes of deep breathing helps to reset the mind and to give yourself a short break to regenerate your emotional reactions to what’s going on around you.

Deep breathing is good for your body as well as your mind. According to Harvard Medical School, “it can slow the heartbeat and lower or stabilize blood pressure.”

The act of breathing is a simple concept, but actually getting ourselves to do it can be a challenge. Remember that even five minutes can be a nice break to recharge your batteries. (You can set a stopwatch or timer if you’d like to).

The concept of deep breathing is part of what we call mindfulness or staying present in our lives.

Psychology Today refers to mindfulness as “a state of active, open attention on the present. When you’re mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance, without judging them good or bad. Instead of letting your life pass you by, mindfulness means living in the moment and awakening to experience.”

If you’d like to learn more, West Valley Counseling Center hosts a weekly Mindfulness Group. Check out our calendar to see when the next session is scheduled. We’d love for you to join us.

Remember that the staff at West Valley Counseling Center are always here to help, and to help you talk about it. West Valley Counseling Center is located at 19634 Ventura Blvd Suite 212, Tarzana, CA 91356. Phone us at (818) 758-9450, or email info@westvalleycounseling.org.

Written By Sharon Burnett, Ph.D., from WVCC